In how many languages can I say this?

Joyeux Noël, Feliz Navidad, Merry Christmas, C Pождеством Xристовом, Buon Natale, Bon Nadal, Срећан Божић, Shnorhavor Surb tsnund, Djoyeus Noyé, Zalig Kerstmis, Gesëende Kersfees, Maligayan Pasko!, God Jul or Gledelig Jul, Idah Saidan Wa Sanah Jadidah...

Zimbabbel/Zimbavardage

This Saturday 27th, Thomas and me organised a short testimony on how our life in Zimbabwe has been going. It'll be in Vilvoorde, from 14h to 17h.

For more info, check out the invitation.

Dubai

We spend five days in Dubai, as a stopover with Emirates Airlines. Expensive, massive, impressive, some of the words that come to mind.

We spend a couple of nights at the youth hostel (with a swimming pool that we never approached), met with a friend of mine from Tunisia who is teaching there at the American University, and spend the last night with friends of Thomas, Belgians working there.

Though interesting and glad that I have been there, not my kid of city. Seems like what they're lacking in culture and nature, they're making up for with money, lots of it. Quite the contrast when you're coming from Zim.

They have the highest building in the world, some 700 meters high (which Thomas is crocking into here), artificial islands in front of the coast plastered with commercial centers and theme parks, each competing to be bigger then the others. Construction sites everywhere, traffic all the time and nothing cheap, that seemed most of Dubai. Though I'm sure that to live there can be interesting, and allow you to live quite confortably and pleasantly. Would have a preference though for one of the other Arab countries, like Oman or Yemen (btw, we actually drove through Oman for a couple of hours, without noticing much of a difference). Plans for the future...

Landed in Dubai

We just arrived safely in Dubai. Because the plane was full and we had been patiently waiting to go in as last, we got upgraded from Jo'burg to business class, which was splendid! Salmon, champagne, massaging chairs... Never had a flight so pleasant. Venom is in the tail though, and turned out while we were sipping Kirr Royal, our luggage was left behind. Hopefully it will still turn up though.... Now here at the airport in Dubai. Everything sounds like Eurodisney, grand, commercial and expensive. No Couchsurfer to host us, but a couple of contacts of people that can take us around, which'll be nice to try and get out of the touristy circuit. Anyway, it won't be for very long, since 4 nights from now, we're off again, to freezing Paris. Hope we'll have our warm sweaters by then ;-)

We'll probably stay at the Dubai Youth Hostel in Al Qusais. Thomas bought a SIM card, so should you need to reach us: +971 502898375.

Riddles...

Wednesday is our graduation from Shona’s second term (and level, though it certainly doesn’t feel that way). That also includes a little ceremony, and with our group, we choose to do a type of quiz, rather than a boring little presentation. So, we’re asking riddles, mostly from the tradional shona here but also a couple of ours.

My favourite from the Shona one is this one:
Pota neko tisangani, chii? - iBandi
You go this way, I go that way, and we’ll meet somewhere else. What is it? – A belt.

The one I added from our culture was this one, a classic I like:
“What can run, but never walks?
What has a mouth, but never speaks,
What has a bed, but never sleeps?
What has a head, but never weeps?”

Attempts are welcome as a comment, after three tries, I’ll put up the correct one, okay ;-)

Day 4: Thursday – all those magical universes

In order to escape harsh Zimbabwean reality, both Thomas and me have submerged ourselves in fantasy. Evenings without electricity, Harare without a lot of cultural possibilities, so we often spend hours with our flashlights on our head, reading.

Our current different universes include classics: Stephen King (the entire Dark Tower series), the vampires from Anne Rice, Philip Pullman, Terry Pratchett, but also my most recent discovery, Robert Jordan’s books series called “the Wheel of Time”. There are eleven books for this one, but apparently he died before finishing them, to the great frustration of fans.

My last check

I just made out a check for 51 quadrillion Zim dollars... That means one thousand million million, or 15 zeros...

1,000,000,000,000,000

Must be the biggest check I ever made out...
For your info, that was worth about 100USD, made out to Air Zimbabwe, for the return flight of 8 people from Bulawayo, that are coming to Harare so that we can go together to the Zambia workshop....

Day 3: Wednesday - cinema

Cinema here sucks big time. We used to try and go see a movie every week. It was (and still is) dirt cheap, about 1 or 2USD to see a movie (usually the equivalent of a local bus fare, nothing compared to the outrageous prices in Europe, where it averages around 7-8€). The cinema in itself is quite comfortable and even still has a curtain going up at the beginning. But honestly, I don’t think we have seen a decent movie since we got here. You can usually choose from three movies, and it seems to me to have a pattern:
- One is usually a ‘black’ comedy, with the likes of Eddy Murphy or Queen Latifa.
- Two usually is a ‘Fast and Furious’, cars combined with bad acting and a storyline thinner than Pietje Puk
- And n° Three can be a kung fu movie, or a big hit, like the Sex and the City Movie, which will then stay on the bill for weeks.

We had to settle for 'Deception', which was pretty bad. But at least it makes for an outing. Anyway, still very happy we have a projector now through work so that we can show some less main stream movies at home...

Day 2: Tuesday - capoeira

This week doesn't feel that special, or maybe that is just me. I just don't feel like I have much worthwhile to share. So let me just focus per post on a single every day aspect of our life here.
Tuesday is, just like Thursday and Saturday, capoeira day. I have been quite disciplined at going, and have missed only a couple of classes when I was out of Harare. It has definitely been a life-saver here for me. Not only does it feel good to be active and sportive again, it is also a martial art I have always liked and admired. I like the way it is intense and acrobatic, and makes your entire body work (and ache in the beginning:-). Also the philosophy behind it, the game, the not touching each other but still anticipating, bluffing. It is not called “fighting”, but “playing” when you go into the rhoda.



I remember this Youtube video a friend forwarded to me, in which you see an excited crow around two guys fighting. One is showing off, doing handstands and backflips, fancy capoeira moves left and right, the other one just looking mean and waiting. When the show-off guy gets close enough, the mean one just hits him once and the show -goes down.


Though it was probably meant to ridicule capoeira, portrays it as a show off fight sport that is worthless, I actually got quite a different message. It is a sport meant to show off, but not to hurt the other one, or even to his expense. The players actually have to allow each other to do the impressive moves and stuff, kinda like while you’re dancing. When you do a tango, you can only make fancy moves if the two work together and feel each other out, stimulate or at worst tease and provoke each other. Capoeira to me feels very similar. Yes, you do sort of bluff and try and intimidate the other, and you can show off and be ‘better’ or ‘win’, but it is not aggressive or anything. Which is one of the reasons why some of us were even talking about using it with youngsters, especially the ones from the militia. During the election period, there have been many stories of youngsters forced into youth camps, where through endless singing and scanting brainwashing sessions youth militia were created. These then went about intimidating and brutalising people. Since the end of the elections, many of these youngsters are quite lost. They can hardly return to their community, because often people they intimidated are still there and know what they have done. So they roam, still in ‘gangs’, sometimes with weapons, sometimes with the support of the local politicians.

Capoeira, allowing aggression but no physical violence could be a way of working with these youngsters. And it is considered cool and would keep them busy, even possibly provide them with an income if they got good at it. Of course, the main obstacle to such a project would be how to get into their world, what could be used as an entry point… Because it doesn’t look like the current regime would stimulate or even allow this kind of peace building…

Day 1: Monday

Monday. I suppose almost everybody dislikes that beginning-of-the-week feeling. Not that our weekend had been particularly exhausting. It was nice, and even a little busy, but no all-night parties or heavy drinking. Sometimes I feel like we’re getting too old for that…

This Monday looked as if it was going to be busy. Since my return from Tanzania, everything seems to have shifted gears up, with the partner organisations busy and buzzing, and a budget to finish before the end of the year.
Anyway, got up at 6.30, at the same time as Thomas (who has to leave the house by 7am, poor guy). No time for our shared cup of coffee, cause he is off. I linger in the house for another two hours, slowly waking up, reading a Stephen King novel. In accordance to my morning rituals, some capoeira to warm up, I play a game of chess against the computer (with a desperate need for the undo-button in order to win).

Monday is help-day. We have two people who come twice a week: Constance, who washes our clothes and cleans the house, and the gardener. He gets here at 8am. He looks at our pool with concern. Our pool has been tricky. When we just got here, green beyond salvation. After some half hearted attempts to clean it out, we emptied it (about 80.000litres, can you imagine) and left it like that for the July-August months that are a bit cool anyway. We filled it back up (taking four days) beginning of September. So nice to jump in the pool in the morning, and it often served as a handy pool of water when we had no water in the pipes. But, since our stay in Tanzania, it has been slowly but inevitably been turning back to the green side of things. Chlorine, changing the sand of the filter, pH control, the chemicals cost an arm and a leg and aren’t doing much good. Sigh. I always though having a pool would be wonderful, but it is turning out to be quite a hassle and a challenge.

Two minutes after he leaves, Constance arrives. I don’t like calling her the maid. It feels funny having a maid. But still, it is so nice not to have to worry about our clothes, or coming home and finding the house cleaned and the beds made. We pay her 20USD for the month, for 8 days of work. It feels like peanuts to me, but it considered more than a handsome salary here. If you know a full time teacher makes 1,5USD a month (62,000Zim$). And at least it is US$, so she only has to change it when she needs the money, without it losing all its value. Constance lives just around the corner. Often, in the afternoons, her daughter comes and stays at our house, which sometimes worries me. If she breaks anything, or falls in the pool or something... I offered to pay Constance for the school fees separately, as a way to stimulate her keeping the child in school, but she hasn’t taken me up on it yet.
Once Constance is in the house, I can leave. Vanessa, my colleague, calls me up. She is going to see Mavambo, one of our partners. Since they want to send some people to a youth camp, I drop off some money at her place to give it to them.

Then, with the bike to the office. There I am greeted by Carrie, my Belgian colleague who is coordinating the programme on agriculture. We get along well. I am so glad she’s here, cause if not, I would have often been working by myself in the office. And we think along the same lines. And of course, without her help, we would have been lost very often. Illustration: last week, when I ran out of fuel with my motorbike, she was the one I called to come to my rescue, bringing the container we have with petrol from our house. She now brought the container back, all filled up again. Honestly, without a little (actually, a big!) help from your friends, Zimbabwe would be impossible to live in for us. You have to rely so often on others…

Two big things for this week on my professional plate:

• the exchange of six staff members from Harare to the youth camp Thuthuka is organising, just out of Bulawayo. This camp is for street children and is meant as a preparation for them to return to (a) home or family. These transitions are often difficult, and the better prepared the kid is, the more the chances are for it to be successful.
• A training around child rights and protection that we’re planning in Zambia mid-November. It asks for so much time and effort, especially since it is abroad (and has to be in order for us to receive the funding for it). Originally, we wanted to do this with one of the partner organisations also working with orphans in Zambia, Chikankata, an institution that has quite an expertise and good facilities to host this one week training. But the planned week was taken, so instead we have to do it all ourselves. Ourselves, meaning me, and thank god, Kristien, who is based in Zambia and coordinating the orphans programme with the 8 partners there. I wouldn’t have been able to organise it without her, since we really want to have it tailor-made to our requests.

Well, anyway, all of that and a million other things kept me busy. Went home for a quick lunch (left-over rice and tuna from Sunday’s birth day party).

In the evening we had two people over for games. Always a bit of a gamble, since we’re never sure to have power and some games just ain’t the same in the dark. Since both our days had been running late, it meant a quick meal or getting something delivered. After a couple of phone calls around, we saw that chances of getting home delivery were very slim in nowadays Zim. So, instead, we decided on a wok. Only vegetables, cause Faray is vegetarian. Loads of soja sauce and it tasted great. We definitely have discovered the pleasures of wokking here…
As for the game, I improvised our local version of Party & Co (a sort of mixture of taboo – pictionnary – charades/hints) and it was great fun. Around 23h30, we bid Marcel goodnight and I drove Faray back (he lives really close to our offices, so only 5 minutes away). Another full and fulfilling day…

And the climax: the wedding in Jambiani

The past two nights we have been in Jambiani, and it finally feels really like a holiday in paradise. Dar was just another city, Stone Town is pictoresque but still a bit rushed, but now we're in a little bungalow by the beach, with nothing to do but chill and chat, exceptmaybe the snorkelling, looking for sea shells... 

Shirley and Mick's family has been arriving druppelsgewijs and we have started taking on our task of translating. Shirley's family is of chinese orgin living in the USA and Mick are all from Bretagne, France, and neither know much of the language of the other group. So we often try to facilitate comprehension, though can't say it is very exhausting so far. Everybody is very pleasant and wanting to get along. 

But the ending seems already so near, just two more days...

Chilling in Stone Town

After a hectic run and quite the rush at the harbor, shiedling off the wanna-be offers for the ferry (took us 20US$/person and 3.5hours to cross), we were on our way to famous and fabulous Zanzibar, that perfect sounding place for honey mooners and place to relax after the hardships of Africa. It is funny, neither me nor Thomas would have thought we would have been going to Zanzibar in the near future... 

 

At our arrival on the island of Zanzibar, we got into Stone Town, an old, very arab like city, with narrow streets and alleys. There we met up with Mick and Shirley, who introduced us to two of her friends, Julia and Shirley 2, both living in New York, with whom we hung out the next couple of days...

Giant tortoise at Prison Island, this one over a hundred years old (and then she gets two Beglians sitting on her ;-) Kidding, she wouldn't even notice it...

The sunset from Stone Town, a classic 

Dar Es Salaam

We stayed for three days with two Couch Surfers, Farshi and Ahoo, in Dar Es Salaam. Where else then through CS could two Belgians meet two Iranese youngsters living in Dar. It meant lots of talking and exchanging, about work, life, development, futures and values. Dar was pleasant, nothing more, nothing less. Pretty developped though, and we didn't get hustled too mkuch on the streets, which was a pleasant surprise.We bought a couple of things, including sandals and a lot of tissues, to lay on the beach or dress ourselves with. But mostly we just hung out. Through Farshi and Ahoo, we also met a Canadian qnd his Kenya wife. In a way, it was a bit sad. 

They have a lovely two year old son. He looks reall y interesting, ex-professor and is doing research into death, as on the water or on the road. Very knowledgeable, but also drunk soon and a bit bitter and angry. Afraid his sons get hurt during the night because of witch craft from envious neighbours.  Thinks keny will explode during the next elections and everybody is so angry. It is sad to see how some people turn after they spend a lot of time in Africa. Hope we'll never get to that point.

Off to Zanzibar, Tanzania

I know, I haven't been that disciplined writing on the blog, sorry. Just to drop a line to say that the next ten days, till the Monday 20th, I will be with Thomas in Tanzania. We are flying into Dar Es Salaam, spending four or five days there, then taking the ferry to Stone Town in Zanzibar.

Reason for this little trip is that Shirley, a good friend of mine from Haiti, is getting married to Mick there, on the 18th. We were invited, the invitation said: wedding on the beach, shoes are optional, so we were hooked. But also, our tourist visa is once again expiring, on the 8th, so we have to leave the country again. Let's hope that when we get back, we can use our brand new passports and start sorting all of this out ourselves...

Anyway, details and pix will follow ;-)

Our very first visitors: two Germans going from Cape to Cairo

Till, a volunteer we met during our time in Plett, South Africa, is currently travelling from South Africa to Cairo. Since he knew we were in Harare and was reminded of that fact once more through CouchSurfing, he dropped us a line and came to spend last weekend with us, together with his backpacking buddy, Daniel.

It was funny, seeing our lives through the eyes of two back packers, especially since I also used to travel around like that. And though most of the time they just tagged along with our 'normal' life here, we also got to do some of the touristy things around Harare. I must admit, it made for quite a full weekend. It made me realize just how busy we are, or keep ourselves.

- Friday, we went to see a sort of dance presentation at the National Ballet, where Sonah's children were performing. After that, we chilled at our house, drinking beer and swimming half naked in the pool, until we went to Londoners, where friends of ours were celebrating a birthday (don't ask me who, I don't know). Didn't make it late though since we had to get up early the day after cause...

- Saturday, in the morning we put the three of us on our one motorbike and drove all accross Harare to go to a football cup organised by two of our partners, Chiedza and Mavambo, with loads of children running around everywhere. We also did some small interviews for our Zims/Zams newsletter, so you'll be able to read more about it... After that, we went to 40 Cork Rd, our usual hang out for lunch and wireless internet. The place the rich but more alternative Bohemians from Harare hang out. After that, a quick stop at the market to buy a handcraft chess set, then back home, but the day wasn't finished yet. Capoeira, with a full work out that would make Jean-Claude Vandamme sweat and us swear. Everybody back to the house, so Ed could use our phoneline to dial up and check his internet connection, since he will shortly be joining his girl friend in a trip around Brazil (we have to support his kind of cause, don't we?). And then off to Nicola's place, a German DW here who organizes her own private cinema in the park, showing Magnolia (1999).

- Sunday, after having gone to Heroes Acre, where all the Heroes of the independance are buried (and supposedly Mugabe has his spot reserved...), where we took some of these pictures... . Next, they insisted on trying to attend a football match of the Harare Dynamos, a 80.000 people match. And finally, in the evening, Thomas and Daniel dropped by a performance from a German hip hopper, Cassius, who seems to be touring Southern Africa for the moment, while Till whipped my ass at chess...

And finally, Monday morning, they rode off into the sunset...

You don't miss the water till the well is dry...

As a general rule, we are very fortunate with the services to our house. Compared to other houses in Harare, we get a lot of electricity (hardly any cuts) and usually full time water. We have no idea as to why this is, some say that it is because we are on the same grid as a big hospital, others that there must be a top guy from a ministry or ZANU PF living in our neighbourhood. Anyway, whatever the reason, we were very happy about this.

Since Saturday though, there was a huge pipe burst two blocks from our house. The entire main road was flooded and water ran as far as three streets down. Bursted pipelines are not uncommon in Harare, our street is almost continuously slippery (which isn't great with a motorbike) and there is a huge hole in the road from which people sometimes come and fill their buckets. Apparently about 75% of all the water in Harare is lost somewhere like this. Meanwhile, people are being charged ridiculous rates of two USD per month for their water consumption. Many would love to pay more, and have water all the time but can't. Needless to say, people often stay without water. Our direct colleagues get water like two or three hours a day and usually at like 2 or 3am. Hardly the time you want to wash your clothes or do the dishes... So, us the lucky ones, we used to have friends or colleagues come over and use our bathroom, wash their hair or kids.

But now, since this bursted pipe last Saturday, we didn't have any water either. And we aren't prepared for this. In the beginning, you say it isn't that bad, I mean, you can survive without bathing for a couple of days. But when all the dishes are dirty, you can't cook or even make coffee, the cat is walking around with its tongue out cause of thirst, you feel all sticky and smelly, you don't dare to go bear the toilet anymore because of the foul smell and you just peeled an orange and can't even wash your hands, well, you miss the water!

Thank God, since this morning, one of the people from our compound asked another neighbour who has a borehole (water pumped up from underground reservoirs) and he let us use a hooze for twenty minutes. I can tell you, seeing the excitement of all the neighbours, all the possible bottles, pots and pans, anything that can contain water were all rushed outside, even an old baby bath, and filled to the rim. Buckets dragged away and back, hearing toilets flushed and bathtubs filled up... Never had such a joyful meeting with the neighbours though, residents and housemaids alike. We were laughing that soon we would have to go shower like that, and make commercial spots for shampoos and all. Touching moment...

Visiting an Orphinage, what can you do....

Last Saturday, Mia, a Belgian lady friend of ours, took us to an orphanage in the south of Harare. They had about 70 children there, age ranging from 0 to 18. She'd asked me to prepare a couple of games, and I'd planned to test out role play as a therapeutic instrument, in which you ask one of the children to tell a story or memory related to a topic (trust, hurt, violence, whatever). That kid then becomes the director and picks somebody to play their role, and other kids to play the other characters. Anyway, the minute we got there, I could tell the kids were way too young, oldest being 10 or something like that. All the older kids had gone to church. But they seemed to have very definite ideas of which games to play, so let's say I just participated.
Every time there was something different to notice, suddenly a girl that turned out to be half blind, or a little kid that wanted to sit on my shoulders, the affection they were craving, and the physical touching. Just holding my pants or a finger. It breaks your heart.
So, it got me thinking. I mean, maybe sometime in the future, we had been thinking about adopting. Zimbabwe seems to have very strict rules about that and anyway, think it is still a bit too soon for me and Thomas, but maybe something in between. A sort of foster formula, maybe having a kid over during the weekends or go on a holiday together, I don't know. It would just be nice to do something, make a small contribution, and it would also make us realize the change it is to have a child even part time. So who knows, it still needs a lot of thinking and discussing, also with the orphanage but just wanted to share a bit of those thoughts with you....

Resilience and Torture

Through one of our partner organisations, our entire network was invited to a workshop on torture and resilience for peopel working with children, organised by the American Embassy. The Center for Victims of Torture facilitated it, an NGO based in the US and strongly outspoken against the possible American use of torture.

They worked in countries like RD, Sierra Leone, and our facilitator, a psychologist named David, had accompanied child soldiers there. Quite fascinating stories, and he used dance as a therapeutic tool, with moves that express feelings and emotions. We did an exercise on role play, in which a child that has lived through a traumatising experience can express itself and try to deal with it. You pick a theme, eg, violence, or trust or betrayal, and ask them in groups of four or five to work around it. A volunteer from the children is asked to share a story with the others around this topic. He then picks somebody to play his role and directs the others, restaging the entire event, but now from the point of view of somebody who is in control. It can dramatically change his prespective or outlook, as well as for the others, being put into these situations (often very recognisable) can be confronting and provoke useful debates and sharing. Imagine doing a play around bullying, and a bully being put in the shoes of the bullied... Most of the groups we did it with invented a story though, made it more like theater than as a therapeutic tool. Even our group started out like that, and though it allows to discuss themes and visions, it does not have the same impact as personal memories or traumas. But then of course, with people you just met in a workshop, it is hard to share personal memories and stories like that...

So, though I am sure the others from my group had a lot more stories than they wanted to share with us, I eventually volunteered to try and do it with my small trauma of getting attacked in Jo'burg, what is now already 8 years ago. I didn't even realize at the time I had been traumatised, but having gone back to the place just last year, the strong emotions etc made me realize it was. And actually, that has been quite helpful in order to better understand and grasp therapies or counselling tools, just imaging working with those tools around that (ridiculously small) personal trauma. And here again, it changed my perspective: it seemed I just couldn't get it right, I kept asking them to change this or that, the agressor to be more threatening, the bystanders more guilty as they just watched, the police man less friendly. I wanted it to ressemble it the situation completely, and it all came flooding back. Not in a bad way, or as flashbacks, but still. So it was useful as how to talk and share this kind of memories...

Can't say I felt healed or had the impression of getting closure though. Maybe lack of time, or lack of aftertalk, or maybe it just isn't a wonder tool for me either...

Safely back in Zim

Well, I had been looking forward to it since a couple of days, we're back in Zim!
Visiting Belgium always is a bit of busy running around with backpacks and trying to see as many people in as little time as possible, but still have quality time.
So yesterday we got back into Harare, again with Ethiopian Airlines and their precious 45kilo allowances of which we make the most. Veerle had come to pick us up just before they are leaving to Madagascar. All of Volens cooperants seem to be away for now, holidays to Belgium or elsewhere. It does mean that nobody seems to be really waiting for us. But it was nice getting back home, where the paint has arrived so we can make it even more homely soon.
Dexter, our cat and pathetically enough one of the main reasons I was anxious to get back, was fine, had gotten bigger but remains tiny if I compare him with Harry, our cat in Liege.
And now, I got the bike back out, am back at the office with the uncertain internet connection, still trying to get my hands on some Zim money but to no avail so far. It'll be another meatless meal today I fear...

My second tattoo

When I turned twenty four, after graduating and leaving Belgium on my first real job, I got my first tatou. It was based on the Arab word for respect, but with added symbolism.


Now, for my thirtiest birthday, and while starting out in Africa as a continent to explore, I got my second, based now on the chinese symbol for "balance". It is placed on my upper left thigh, symmatrical with the first one which is on the left thigh (with a birth mark in the center).



The last image is a picture of how it looks on my skin, freshly put on today...

Trouw van ons moeder, Annie en Jan

Deze dag, 8-8-8, hadden Jan en ons moeder gekozen om hun huwelijk te houden.
Eerst naar het stadhuis, met dichte vrienden en familie, dan naar het parochiezaaltje om het feest te houden.

Buffet, de kinderen die voor jeugdfoto's hadden gezorgd om te projecteren en een kleine kwis, muziek. Tot tegen 23u30, toen we nog snel gingen opruimen.

Veel geluk gewenst aan het paar!

Solution Focused Therapy : Miracles?

While I am here in Belgium, I wanted to use my time here to look for some of our Western therapeutic tools, especially the ones developed for dealing with children and bereavement or traumas. Through Gérald Brassine, a Belgian psychologist who spent some time working in the USA, I came across the solution focused therapy.

Solution focused brief therapy (SFBT), often referred to as simply 'solution focused therapy' or 'brief therapy', is a type of talking therapy. It focuses on what clients want to achieve through therapy rather than on the problem(s) that made them seek help. The approach does not focus on the past, but instead, focuses on the present and future. The therapist/counselor uses respectful curiosity to invite the client to envision their preferred future and then therapist and client start attending to any moves towards it whether these are small increments or large changes. To support this, questions are asked about the client’s story, strengths and resources, and about exceptions to the problem.

The Miracle Question The miracle question is a method of questioning that a coach or therapist uses to aid the client to envision how the future will be different when the problem is no longer present. Also, this may help to establish goals.

A traditional version of the miracle question would go like this:

"Suppose our meeting is over, you go home, do whatever you planned to do for the rest of the day. And then, some time in the evening, you get tired and go to sleep. And in the middle of the night, when you are fast asleep, a miracle happens and all the problems that brought you here today are solved just like that. But since the miracle happened over night nobody is telling you that the miracle happened. When you wake up the next morning, how are you going to start discovering that the miracle happened? ... What else are you going to notice? What else?"

It should get very good results, with clients only needing a couple of sessions, and not years and years of therapy. Also new to me, was the concept of "secondary victimisation": the victim of some traumatic experience going through the pain each time when telling the fact to police men or therapists who think that "talking about it will help them heal".

Bartje's en Domi's trouw

Na 8 jaar samenzijn is mijn broertje, Bart, in het huwelijksbootje gestapt met Dominique. Zeker de gelegenheid om terug even naar België te komen om dit speciaal moment te kunnen delen met hun. Het was één van de beste trouws waar ik ooit naartoe geweest ben. Smaakvol en gezellig, niet te druk maar wel gevuld. De Vandewalles hadden er hun gewoonlijke creativiteit tegenaan gegooid, met powerpoint en muziek. Ik had daarentegen het privilege eventjes achter de schermen te mogen piepen en tussen de ceremonie (de vrijdag) en het feest (zaterdag avond) bij het kersverse bruidspaar te mogen logeren. 't Is wel een grappige indruk eigenlijk, vooral dat ik eraan twijfel ooit zelf zo'n ceremonie te organiseren. Nochtans, moest het wel eens gebeuren, dan zou er dezelfde familie op zijn uitgenodigd, van onze kant althans, wat wel een grappige indruk gaf. Vooral omdat Thomas er jammer genoeg niet bij was (een feit waar ik tot vervelens toe heb moeten uitleg bij geven). Hij komt pas deze donderdag aan omwille van praktische redenen, maar ik heb hem wel gemist... Ach, ieder zijn doudou he...

Instrumenten voor therapie in Zim: Stel je eens voor... (2)

Dat je een geheim meedraagt. Iets dat je kwaad maakt, kwaad op anderen, kwaad op jezelf, iets waarvoor je je schaamt, maar dat teglijk te groot is om in je kleine lichaam te blijven. Gisteren slaag gekregen, vader die dronk thuiskwam, je moeder die sterft aan AIDS... Hoe krijg je zoiets groots en ingrijpends eruit ? Maar stel nu dat je een ander gezicht zou kunnen opzetten, je verbergen achter een masker, een geheime identiteit, waarbij je je niet moet blootgeven.

Dat kun je doen met poppenkast. Zoiets eenvoudig, en zo sprekend tot kinderen. Maar ook om hun te laten spreken, ze zelf hun personage laten ontwerpen, hun eigen verhalen, hun eigen leven uitbeelden. En waarom dan niet de ouders uitnodigen, hun laten zien waarmee hun kinderen bezig zijn, wat hen raakt en in hun leeft...

En als het schoentje past...

Instrumenten voor therapie in Zim: Stel je eens voor... (1)

Dat je een boom zonder wortels bent. Dat je nooit of nauwelijks je ouders hebt gekend. Geen verhalen over hun jeugd, geen liefde en bevestiging van je verwekkers, gen idee over wat ze belangrijk voor je vinden, of ze trots op je zouden zijn geweest. Wezen hebben altijd medelijde opgewekt, maar staan we vaak echt stil bij de impact dat zoiets op een kind heeft, op haar/zijn beeld van de wereld.

En stel je nu eens voor dat je opeens hun stem kunt horen, van de andere kant. Dat ze je toespreken over waar ze vandaan komen, wat ze van je hopen, hoe ze willen dat je ze trots kan maken.

Dat is het doel van memoryboxen. De stem van je ouders te laten horen. Een doos wordt samengesteld door de ouders die weten dat ze ziek zijn. Met de hulp van een NGO medewerker, van familieleden, van vrienden. Een cassette, video of audio, gaat erin, met boodschappen van de ouders, dingen die ze willen doorgeven. Een uur is niet veel, maar het kan een wereld van verschil betekenen voor kinderen die het horen als ze groot zijn. Vaak wordt de opening van deze dozen gekoppeld aan een kamp, zodat verschillende kinderen in dezelfde situatie samen de dozen openen en de boodschappen ontdekken. Ingrijpende en sterke momenten, gedeeld met anderen, niet alleen zijn. Voor een generatie zonder ouders, maar die hoop willen hebben. Passend, niet?

Hoe werken we met een aangepaste vorming....

Voor ons in Zuidelijk Afrika telt de human factor erg binnen projecten. Daarom dat we ons als een capacity building organisation profileren. Daarom dat we als cooperanten naar hier komen en niet enkel geld geven aan goede doelen. Want we merken dat de staf van lokale organisaties vaak beter weet hoe om te gaan met bepaalde problemen in de maatschappij, en ook na het vertrek van de cooperant gaan zij het verder moeten zetten. Daarentegen biedt een cooperant vaak een anderwaarde (in tegenstelling tot een meerwaarde) omdat hij/zij een ander perspectief heeft, andere ervaringen. Met de uitwisseling, kunnen sommigen van deze ervaringen worden aangepast om hier te worden gebruikt.

Hier in Zimbabwe zijn er meer dan anderhalf miljoen wezen omwille van de AIDS/HIV epidemie (levensverwachting van 35 jaar, en 20 tot 30% van de bevolking is seropositief). Deze kinderen hebben zorg nodig en moeten kampen met verschillende materiële maar ook psychologische noden. En nu dit zo de hele maatschappij betreft moeten therapeutische intrumenten werden aangepast om hiermee om te gaan, met de rouw, het verlies in vaak moeilijke omstandigheden. Wij trachten een vijftiental van deze instrumenten te ontwikkelen en aan te passen, om dan in de twee grootste steden van Zimbabwe toe te passen. Twee van deze instrumenten worden hier in de boxen uitgelegd (memory boxen en poppenkast), op zich eenvoudige en kostloze technieken maar die met aanpassing en vorming tot krachtige therapeutische instrumenten kunnen worden omgebouwd.

Our Volens offices in Harare

A little video in which me and Caroline are presenting our offices, if anybody is interested in seeing where we work...

Hapiness is....?

Uit het Nieuwsblad van vandaag:

"Hele wereld wordt gelukkiger, behalve Belgen

BRUSSEL - Volgens een internationaal onderzoek bij 350.000 mensen was de wereldbevolking nooit zo gelukkig. Opvallend, bij de weinige landen die de afgelopen jaren 'ongelukkiger' werden, zit België.

Een echte reden daarvoor zien de onderzoekers niet, schrijft Het Laatste Nieuws woensdag. 'Wat we wel kunnen aanwijzen, is dat etnische problemen er iets mee te maken hebben', aldus onderzoeksleider Ronald Inglehart van de universiteit van Michigan.

Daarmee verwijst de man naar de problematiek rond Vlaanderen en Wallonië. We staan nog steeds op plaats 20 in de lijst met 97 landen. De Denen zijn volgens het onderzoek het gelukkigst, in Zimbabwe zijn ze het minst gelukkig."

NOS nieuws over de Zim verkiezingen

Van een bevriende journalist...

If not, from the BBC
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7476712.stm

Elections... Plus les choses changent, plus elles restent les mêmes

Citons le Soir belge:

"Quelque 9.000 bureaux de vote ont ouvert leurs portes à 7 heures (heure belge) et resteront ouverts pendant douze heures pour accueillir un maximum de 5,9 millions de Zimbabwéens inscrits sur les listes électorales.

Sur les bulletins de vote figureront les noms du président Mugabe, 84 ans, et du chef de l’opposition Morgan Tsvangirai, 56 ans, car la commission électorale du Zimbabwe (ZEC) a estimé que le retrait de ce dernier, dimanche, était intervenu trop tard.

Le leader du Mouvement pour le changement démocratique (MDC) a renoncé au duel parce qu’il estime ne « pas pouvoir demander aux électeurs de risquer leur vie en votant ». Selon lui, le scrutin n’a aucune chance d’être libre et équitable à cause de la campagne de violences et d’intimidation menée par les partisans du régime."

http://lesoir.be/actualite/monde/un-scrutin-joue-d-avance-au-2008-06-27-610635.shtml

Our newsletter the Zims 2 - our second issue

Dear friends around the world,

In May we sent you our brand new premiere, the first of our The Zims, a regular newsletter from Zimbabwe. After your enthusiastic responses, we're sending you our second - and improved, June issue, with an extra page devoted to Zambia, and of course, the topic on everybody's lips, how the political situation regarding the elections is affecting our work and life...

Hope you will read it with interest and enjoyment, while we sit out the elections in suspense...

Zim-greetings,

Numbers that count: Studying the basics

Currently, we are working on what is called a baseline study.

This is usually required by the donors, but is also very important information for Volens. Before a programme can begin, a study is made of the current situation, so that afterwards it is possible to monitor the evolution and see whether the project was successful. We hereby want to present you some of the info we gathered.

In the programme working with OVC in Zimbabwe, the 8 partners of Volens reach a total of 39.760 orphans and vulnerable children and work with 170 staff members and 3.227 volunteers.

It also includes evaluating their strengths and weaknesses on a scale of 1 to 6, and also regarding the integration of different issues. Here they scored quiet well on to which extent the children and the communities are involved in the decision making of projects (4.6/6). Next came gender and HIV/AIDS (4/6), which are of course very important working issues in southern Africa. Next came their position on advocacy (3.6/6) and networking (3.3/6). The lowest scores were on ecology (2.8/6 - also less relevant to OVC work) and having a policy on children with disabilities came in last (2.2/6).

And our special page on Zambia:

Een kattige verrassing voor mijn verjaardag

Zaterdag voor de barbeque had één van mijn gasten toch wel wat te vers vlees mee: hierbij officieel voorgesteld, Dexter. Nog maar drie weken oud, zwart en wit, en zo schattig en zot als men kan verwachten van een kitten.
Nee, ik ga geen van die katzotten worden die elke dag een blog maakt over wat zijn kat die dag weer heeft uitgestoken, maar dacht dat het toch de moeite waard was om hem even aan jullie voor te stellen. Want het moet toegegeven worden, de kwaliteit van ons huisleven is weer sterk gestegen. Het heeft iets om enthousiast begroet te worden, zelfs al heeft het vaak meer te maken met het eten dat dan op magische wijze in zijn bakje verschijnt dan met liefde... En hoewel het 's nacht soms een beetje te druk is, blijft het snoezen en snoezig...

B'day braai

Sim

Quand on avait 30 ans...

Quel joie d'être trillionaire pour son anniversaire. Un gâteau d'anniversaire qui vaut 70 milliards de Zim$, combien de gens peuvent dire ça?
Cet après-midi, on va le manger lors d'un barbecue/house warming party avec quelques invités, le nouveau cercle d'amis qu'on essaie de construire... une quarantaine personne invitées... Un peu de nostalgie pour ceux qui sont loin, les anciens cercles, surtout avec les messages... ou parfois avec le manque de messages.

Symbols of Zimbabwe : Epworth balancing rocks

This Sunday, as to uphold a bit of our tourist status, we went to Epworth balancing rocks, just 13km outside of Harare. They are huge rocks that by freakish nature are in delicate (well, rather delicate) balancing positions. They have become a symbol of Zimbabwe, similar to the Zimbabwean bird, and are printed on the Zimbabwean bank notes...
But they especially make for a nice background setting for pictures :-)